Are you overwhelmed? I am at times. I wear MANY hats. I’m a wife, mom, graduate student, and student worker. It is easy to become overwhelmed. There have been days I felt like I was dragging pieces of myself from place to place, existing rather than thriving. I barely make it through classes. I arrive home only to realize I forgot what my kids’ faces look like! (Well, okay, almost forgot.) But wait, it’s time to manage dinner and homework, and say hello to my husband. No wonder my kids want my attention and no wonder I end up with short nerves. This day easily repeated, like Groundhog’s Day, simply because I could not fully manage or cope with my stress. I was stuck.
Overwhelmed? Keep Your Boat Steady.
Overwhelmed? BH WELL's very own Bassema Abu-Farsakh relates to feeling overwhelmed as a wife, parent, graduate student, and student worker. This video shares practical tips to help keep our boats steady as we cope with day-to-day stress.
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Every person on earth has challenges in life but the good news is that there ARE ways to carry all these pieces and find balance. I love this saying, “Sometimes we cannot control the wind, but we can direct the sail.” However, when we are stressed, what we need at the moment may be just to keep our boat steady!
Here are some ways I have found help me deal with day-to-day stress. Feel free to pick one or two of your favorites to help your boat get back to steady!
- No one in the world is perfect. So accept your strengths and weaknesses as they are and appreciate yourself.
- FORGIVE yourself and LEARN from your mistakes.
- STOP comparing yourself with other people. You are unique.
- Always believe there is something GOOD in everyone as well as in YOU.
- Celebrate your achievements, small or big! The sense of success becomes real when you do what you enjoy (watch a nice movie, dance, or hang out with a friend)
- Do not spend time thinking about what other people think of you. Value yourself.
- When possible, surround yourself with POSITIVE people and LIMIT TIME with negative people.
- Find the POSITIVE side in any life event. Even if something horrible happens, we can always learn and grow through it.
- Find positive ways to EXPRESS your emotion (writing, singing, or watching a movie).
- Balance your day by keeping a TO DO list. Set time limits for work tasks. Include flexibility in your day along with time for loved ones.
- Schedule a routine BREAK to refuel (exercise, play with your kids or pets, go for a walk, practice deep breathing, or take a day nap).
- BE MINDFUL, just focus on the moment and press pause on the stresses of life.
- SMILE! There is great power in smiling! It actually increases energy and eliminates stress.
- FORGIVE others. I know it is not an easy task. However, the power of forgiveness can bring joy, harmony, and peace to you and your family.
Citations
Haun, V. C., Nübold, A., & Bauer, A. G. (2018). Being mindful at work and at home: Buffering effects in the stressor–detachment model. Journal of Occupational and Organizational Psychology, 91(2), 385-410.
Kraft, T. L., & Pressman, S. D. (2012). Grin and bear it: The influence of manipulated facial expression on the stress response. Psychological science, 23(11), 1372-1378.
Rasmussen, K. R., Stackhouse, M., Boon, S. D., Comstock, K., & Ross, R. (2019). Meta-analytic connections between forgiveness and health: the moderating effects of forgiveness-related distinctions. Psychology & health, 34(5), 515-534.
Bassema Abu-Farsakh is a registered nurse with expertise in psychiatric and medical-surgical nursing, a wife, a mom of two boys, a graduate nursing student, a graduate research assistant, and a real person who enjoys keeping her boat steady.